I came from flowers shop and excitedly made a painting in hardly few minutes...well, my hands still have color as I type here. After I finished it a bit...I called HIM and told him that I have made a painting and want to gift it to you... He asked me, 'why are you obsessed with me?" I didn't understand why would HE think he has something in him that I would like to be obsessed with him?
Well truly, I saw him today morning and I took his shirt to wear; I do have a lot of shirts from HIM, but it was one crazy action, which I didn't think about. After I came back home, I saw that shirt on my bed...I smelled it, it still has HIS smell in it...I felt weird and told myself to focus on myself and my life, and to stop thinking about HIM, so I started painting...and made my painting called 'FOCUS'.
I wanted to gift it to him cos he is the one who made me loose my focus and he is the one who is (virtually) making me focus on my life back again...I did loose five years but I am not as crazy and sad about it as I was before. I just wanted to share happiness and laughter and my creativity with him but....THIS IS WHAT LOVE MAKES YOU!
I am not the one who can shut creativity off and on, I guess I do need to learn the ways of so called elite and outside upper class world!
I am still happy and excited that I am painting....
Tags Desires, Expression, Sucks